Fogland

What repeatedly stands in the way of our ability to succeed?

For the purpose of this discussion, I'm going to call it "the fog." The fog represents a trance state, a state of unconsciousness that feels like the mentality of a toddler or young child. It might be a feeling of fear, but more often, it's a primitive defense mechanism that has been adopted for coping with fear.

We may notice that we're in the fog when our hot buttons have been pushed and we've reacted immaturely, all the while knowing better. It might be when we don't believe a problem can be solved no matter how we slice it: the feeling of "this will never work out, never has-never will." Something along the lines of "I can't do it, I've tried everything" may come up in certain situations, repeatedly. Or, perhaps we keep pushing hard for the desired result, even though we see great damage being senselessly inflicted. Whatever it is, we can't help ourselves and something deep inside "knows better," yet we can't seem to access it when we most need it: "Oh, if I'd had my full wits about me, I'd have said..."
Somehow, we become totally frozen and can't think straight.

That's what I'm calling the fog. I invite you into a conversation I recently had with someone over their "fog" issue. I hope you can take something away from it.

"You were saying that you experienced the fog not so much in high school, as much as later in college. The fog is merely the defense tactic minus the awareness of what it's defending against, right? Of course we get better at using our fog defense over time, you probably only mastered it in college!

"It behooves you to look beyond the fog directly at the fear that underlies it. To face and survive the fear at least ONCE in your life is to be able to see it properly. After you've seen it once, you must practice surviving the fear that drove you to numbness repeatedly and with greater consciousness, if you want to master it in order to get on with what's important in your life.

"When I say at least once, I mean not just intellectually, but as a visceral experience; and not just emotionally, but cognitively too! With eyes wide open, can you experience all three at the same time, body sensation, emotional feeling, and cognitive awareness? Can you move through your fear without "fainting" i.e., without losing consciousness and later waking up, recovered from some exhaustion that tries to pass for catharsis? Can you visit your fear without falling into the fog and later thinking, "Oh I should never have reacted that way, that was NOT what I wanted to do."

"Be prepared to survive the experience of the fear that underlies the fog several times in order for it to resolve, dissipate, melt away, lose its potency. You're still running into that same fear and not experiencing it every single time you go into fogland! It's a compulsive way of running from unpleasantness.

"You can't "fix" the fear, or address it, or even feel it properly while in it, while you're in the distorted perspective of fogland. The task is to wake up to the familiarity of fogland and be willing to step out of the insanity. To do that effectively and consistently, you must listen for and truly hear the voice that put you there, the voice that drives the fear, the one that says "You're not good enough," "you're alone in this," "who do you think you are?" "this will never work..."

"You never really hear that voice when you're defending, arguing with it while still in the fog! You can only notice the voice if, for a moment, you listen to it as though it might be true. That may seem too painful, but the wonderful gift is that it genuinely CAN'T be true. So ultimately, by listening carefully and really hearing it, you win: you debunk the lie that has been running you ragged!

"When you recognize those disempowering sensations in your body, your feelings and your thoughts as being driven by the voice of superego, untruth, lie, etc., when you are properly convinced they're a lie, then you you can learn to "survive," "bear," or consciously breathe through the barricade of "false sensations" (emotions, thoughts, patterns.) These strong sensations are after all "true memories" as far as your body is concerned! These true memories were indeed experienced time and time again in your history... That's what you have to face squarely and shake out: real memories embedded in your cellular, material being: your body!"

IBP techniques can show you the true nature of your fog and the lie that repeatedly drives you into it. IBP can show you how to step out of the fog directly, effectively and consistently. It takes courage to want to experience your fog in order to learn what fears lurk beneath. It's something few are willing to try until the pain of failure has become more frightening than the prospect of exploring the nature of our illusory fears.